


My Pheonix

by FrankieOlive



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-22
Updated: 2016-09-22
Packaged: 2018-08-16 19:05:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 468
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8113972
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FrankieOlive/pseuds/FrankieOlive
Summary: A small little Steve blurb.





	

I was always small in my dreams, even when I got big. I dreamt I was an ant on a mountain or a fly in a desert- a tiny part of something permanent and unimaginably large. I wake up and feel how close my shoulders loom to the edge of the bed and this version of reality comes back slow. The powers to back up the trying. I never used to carry enough weight to leave footprints. I would stomp my shoes into the ground and eventually I would give up and spit instead- proof I had been there. Now my boots dig deep wherever I go, leaving a trail for whoever wants to follow. My ma always told me to be confident. She watched me drag my 112 pound body back into her house every night covered in the days dirt and fight. She always looked at me real hard and said there was something in me. Whenever I asked what it was she would laugh and say "bread and bones!" I tried not to scare her but I know I did. Sometimes I would come home and see her and Buck talking real quiet at the table with their eyes big and close. He's the only other person who ever looked at me like I was a leaf in the wind. He and ma got along like two people stranded on the same island.  
Once, when Buck and I were eight, some big monster of a kid tried to follow us home. He walked slow behind us, laughing the whole way. He started shouting that we should stop, that he had some questions to ask us. So I turned to the kid and screamed to leave me and my best bud alone. The kid laughed and threw a rock at us and I think it was meant to be a warning but it hit me in the gut. I was real small back then and I had enough trouble breathing without a stomach full of rock. Sometimes just breathing felt like the end. The kid didn't know me and I could tell he felt bad because he ran away scared, he didn't know a rock could kill me. Hell, a pebble could have killed me back then. Buck sat right by me and held my hand. My eyes were closed but I felt his tears drip down on to me and I knew I had to get up. I felt my stomach contracting and my lungs looking for air. It hurt to lay on the ground and it hurt that it only took one rock to get me there but mostly it hurt to know that Bucky was sad. That's the thing about people who love you that hard- you can feel it above anything else.


End file.
